Deep down I wanted to be officially disfellowshipped. The moment I was told 'you are disfellowshipped ...', a sense of peace and closure came over me. I felt God's love, perhaps for the first time in my life. Now it was just me and God. I didn't have to answer to Watchtower Society any more. I was done! I was free.
I could finally have a personal relationship with God and worship him according to my conscience. I believe that by being officially disfellowshipped, a channel or path opened up for God to speak with me directly and it felt wonderful! My loyalties were no longer split between serving God and serving the organization's Governing Body. There was no longer a conflict. God was now my only authority. Matthew 28:18
Today I've spent more time out of the organization than I spent as a Jehovah's Witness. Without being disfellowshipped, my relationship with God, would never be as strong as it is now. I feel God's presence and love for me in every moment. I give thanks that he opened my eyes.
Freedom, happiness, and love. This is my life now. It is my prayer for you as well.