How To Help A Disfellowshipped Jehovah's Witness.

Five Steps To Helping A Disfellowshipped Witness.

One of the biggest mistakes people make is trying to convert a disfellowshipped JW to their religion or 'save' them. That might be your ultimate goal, but please don't start there.

You can't help if you start by discussing doctrines such as the Trinity or that Jesus is God. Don't do it. They're not ready for that yet.

They'll be open to learning about all your beliefs at the proper time, but not right now.

If you treat disfellowshipped JW's in the right way, they'll never go back to the Watchtower. And they will be forever grateful for your kindness. But first you'll need to teach them by example what it truly means to be Christ-like.

Step 1. Thoroughly Research What They Believe.

Before you begin, know what you're dealing with. Read all the articles on this site to really understand where they're coming from and what they believe. You can't help people you don't understand.

Step 2. Let Them Know It's Safe.

Unfortunately, people are not likely to tell you they're disfellowshipped from the JW's or that they need help. If you suspect someone might be a former JW, you'll need to draw them out and let them know i t's safe for them to tell you anything.

Step 3. Take An Interest In Them.

If they do confide in you that they're disfellowshipped, be happy. Give them a hug if you want to. Commend them for their honesty. Tell them that you value honesty in your friends more than anything else, - and mean it. This will encourage them to open up to you. If they see any hint that you'll reject them or judge them, they'll stop talking.

Avoid the temptation to offer advice or tell them what you believe. Just let them talk. Ask questions to thoroughly understand their viewpoints. Accept what they say without judgment. Don't try to change their way of thinking in anyway. Never suggest that you want to convert them to your religion or that you know someone who can help them recover from their experience as a JW.

Step 4. Surround Them With Good People.

One of the best things you can do is introduce them to other people like yourself who are non judgmental and accepting. Let your friends know about this site and what you know about helping JW's so that as a team your can work together.

What disfellowshipped people need more than anything else is community, love, and understanding. That's what they miss the most. They just lost their entire family and all their close friends. Once they know they have genuine friends and lots of them, they will begin to feel safe and secure.

The majority of Jehovah's Witnesses are very good people and they love God. When they get disfellowshipped, that doesn't change. However they take most of their beliefs with them. As hard as they try to break free, they can't. They are still in a religious trap. You can help them break free, but only when they feel it's safe enough to leave the trap! Remember. The trap is not a physical trap. They're no longer involved with the JW's. However they're still in an emotional and spiritual trap. They've been in there so long, that they're afraid of stepping outside. They're afraid of the world beyond the tiny box that's been their home for many years. You and your frends can assure a disfellowshipped Witness that the world beyond the trap is safe. They can come out and play. There's nothing to be afraid of. But first you need to set the right example.

Jehovah's Witnesses only understand 'conditional love'. Witnesses are not loved unless they're working hard for Jehovah and supporting the Wathtower. Because they now disagree and left the Watchtower, they are rejected by the entire organization, family, and friends. The Watchtower goes one step further and encourages Witnesses to hate apostates

If a disfellowshipped JW was born into the religion, all they understand is 'conditional love' which is very controlling and manipulative. Really, it's not love at all.

It's up to you to show them what love really means. What does it mean to be Christ-like? Even if you're not Christian, you can help. Being Christ-like simply means to be unconditionally loving. Luke 6:27-41. The way to teach unconditional love is by example.

Here's how you can help. Show them how much you care, - then teach them what you know. 'People don't care how much you know, until they know how much you care.'

Step 5. Teach Them What You Know.

By being unconditionally accepting and non judgmental, you will show your new disfellowshipped friend something they've never experienced before, - unconditional love. It will feel so good, that in a relatively short period of time, they will want to be just like you. They will want to learn from your example. They will want to know everything you know. They will want to know what you believe in. They will want to know how they can help others in the same way you've helped them. You've changed their life forever.

Once they know how much you care, they'll care about how much you know. It is at this point that you'll be able to teach them facts. You've already taught them everything they need to know about God. How to be accepting, non judgmental, loving, and kind.

The Bible says this. "Teacher," he asked, "what must I do to inherit eternal life?" "What is written in the Law?" he replied. "How do you read it?" He answered: "'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind'; and, 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'" "You have answered correctly," Jesus replied. "Do this and you will live." Luke 10:25-28

What It's Like To Be Disfellowshipped